if only

by H. Fly

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released November 2, 2014



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the human fly Harrisonburg, Virginia

est. 2012

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Track Name: fall of rome
this unnamed disease
well it's never getting better
first it starts at the feet
then it follows like a shadow on the
wall looming, then goes straight for the throat again
to the falls to capsize the boat again
aflame, down the street
but you don a happy face + it's okay

i never liked that place much anyway

it's slow, medicates
but it doesn't nurse the body it just
worsens the pain, creeping up under the sheets
and then throws needles in the hay until it turns into
a needle stack that cracks up at the sight of you
a horse then made lame
this is tantalus, doesn't stand for us anyway

stand for us anyway

thrust into the corner, pillars in disorder
border personality line
you really oughta cut that hair
you really oughta check that stare
you really oughta go somewhere
you really oughta start to care

you really gotta mend that heart
you really oughta stop this start
you really oughta play this part
you really should just tear apart
Track Name: outburst
impulsive child, what is it you live for?
are you entitled or misbehaved? they're not sure
labeled as troubled, discarded, left to dry
no one's willing to try
no one will give you chances
you never get a hearing
somewhere, there's wonder
but you don't look endearing
on paper, doctors will ask you how you feel inside
you run away every time

they call them outbursts, but someday they'll be quiet
keep hold emotion, it's pouring out your eyelids
your intuition, invisible to them right now
someday it's gonna burst out

and if they don't understand
you can learn to live without them
feel the pressure crushing down
hop the fence or scream it out, he's just a boy
thinking, "i guess it's just the way i am"

child, come back home
no one hates you and you're not alone
in fact, you are loved
adored, admired
and maybe not right now, I know you're tired
but it'll all burst out
Track Name: snowball
who'd have guessed
mascera runs like an avalanche
i can't promise i'm your biggest fan
but i can promise there might be a chance after all

and your sequins they melt into the sparkle
of realized dreams in the night
then you got too high
why am I surprised?

such is such
I care about most things way too much
your wayfarer eyes in the winter hush
they look awfully nice, will you stay in touch after all?

or will you roll away like a snowball?